By now I have earned my horsey back, but not the rest.
Last weekend John brought me to a public dogging spot. He had told me about it the whole week and because I was denied for quite a while now (and had to wear the plug one week almost 24/7) I had hopes that he might allow me to get raped. When we arrived there were only four or five guys and I started to suck them, just like John told me. I was still locked into the device (Holytrainer), but I wished to desperately to be fucked that I asked him again and again, but he told me and the guys that no, I was not to be fucked into my cunt, but only in the face. And he kept word. I sucked a lot of dicks and swallowed it all, but I remained unfucked and therefore so horny that I was frustrated all the time. So many cocks around me and than that…
John took a lot of photographs from me and published some of them so that others can take a look at me when they’re wanking. After all were pleased, he drove me home and told me to watch me in the bathroom mirror for a while. My make up was ruined, I had spit in the face and in my hair, spunk as well. He came to me, talked to me. He told me to lift my skirt and reveal my caged clit, my ridicolous “manhood”, my scars, my tighs, my belly. He told me to lift my top as well and look at my not existent titties, the desperate look in my eyes, the unfulfilled lust. I was trembling because usually I avoid looking at me too close, but he told me to linger, to really look at myself. I was surprised when I realized that I liked what I saw. I felt sympathy for the slut in the mirror, for her scars and I respected her inferiority. Looking back, I think I might have seen what he might see in me.
Afterwards, he told me to shower and then come to him. When I did, he scrolled through the photographs he had taken, and he began wanking. He didn’t deny me when I sucked him, finally. I love it when he stays in control when others use me. He’s like a sponge. He looks at me, his whore, and it’s like he’d take photos with his eyes, just for his private use, and once we’re alone and I’m out of the spotlight, he can relax and use me, while remembering all the things other men just did to me. He likes me well used. And finally he fucked me in the cunt I had stretched for him one week. I still had the device on, but I came, thankfully. When my body decides that it doesn’t need any clit stimulation to come, I’m feeling that’s the biggest gift I could offer.
Since then he has taken off the device once every day and stroked my clit like about 10 minutes, and without the attempt to make me cum. It’s just that he tells me “I want to stroke you….down there, honey…on your nasty spot…”and that makes me melt. I can’t help but keep wishing it had always been him, from the beginning on. If love had been a part of my training, what a better whore I would be today.