Ugly The Third

It’s been three weeks of strict chastity now and I’ve been allowed again to hump Ugly. Before I was allowed to start, John applied numbing creme again, and when it had kicked it, he watched the clock while I did my best to get hard, keep hard, hump Ugly and cum.

I’m so frustrated, but again I didn’t make it! I’m mad!

John on the other hand seems well entertained, and he humiliates me for my violet balls and my severe horniness. Dang.

Ugly The Second

Tonight John gave me the opportunity to have sex with Ugly again, after I had been kept chaste the whole week. He had thought that this might help, but having the same set up as last week, I just didn’t make it. I guess the numbing creme is too numbing for me, because I really don’t feel anything and you know, cumming by imagines alone without being able to feel isn’t possible at the moment.

So? Back into chastity again and next Saturday I may be allowed to try it again.

At the moment I’m sort of depressed and feel down. I’m unbelievably horny all through the week, but I simply can’t make it. You know, I haven’t had active sex for a very long time and that alone is difficult for me. And although I love humiliation, humping a doll is somehow hurting my feelings. I know Sir will laugh at me for these thoughts, but that’s just it.

I Fucked Ugly

Yesterday was my big day. After I had taken care for Ugly for a week, Master announced ย I would be allowed to hump Ugly in the evening. But he added that beforehand I’d get a special treatment.

So, in the evening he released me from the Birdlock and told me to get romantic with Ugly in our wedding bed. To be honest, after a week of pretending I’m in love with an ugly fuckdoll it was not really weird any more. I kissed and cuddles Ugly the best I could and I got a stiffy immediately. Master said that was pathetic, but the humiliation during the past week didn’t leave me uneffected, right?

Finally John came over and rubbed numbing creme onto my cocklette. It takes a few minutes to numb it really, but it kicked in right away. For some reason it turns me on if he takes care of me with rubbing creme onto me or cleaning my ass with a tissue after he fucked me. It’s so humiliating and delicate at the same time…

He told me to go on with Ugly, lick her cunt so that she would get wet. He took care of that with some lube, telling me that obviously I was a good cuntlicker because Ugly got excited. Then he told me to fuck her. “Use that pathetic sissy prick on your toy”. I did. I was so aroused, but when I entered Ugly, I got mad. I didn’t feel much. I could feel my balls banging against her, but even if my clitty was hard, I could not really feel anything.

“You got 60 seconds to make yourself cum. If you don’t accomplish, it’s another week of chastity”, he announced, and I did my best banging Ugly like a desperate monkey while ignoring John standing right beside me and looking at his watch.

I didn’t make it. Not at all. Not even when he allowed me some more time, to take pictures of me. When he locked me back in, I was only frustrated. That was it. Later he fucked me and told me how pathetic and embarrassing I was. Now I am to take care for Ugly another week and I’m so horny. It’s nice that a plastic fuckdoll gets more pleasure than I do. In case you didn’t notice: I’m a worthless cunt and do as my Master says. Just like he said: I triple my worth with a load of his cum inside my ass.

Thank you, Honey.

My Friend Ugly

It’s been a long time since I last acutually used my cock to fuck anyone. My last real attempts to be the active part must have taken place a long time before I even met John, and I don’t really recall it. It’s just not my piece of cake, like, wanking is alright, but actually fucking someone feels weird and not O.K. for a slut like me. You know, I’m the one to get fucked and used, not vice versa ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve been locked in the Bordlock for a while now and when John told me that on the weekend I was to get some relief, I was nervous and ravenous as well. On Saturday evening he brought me a small packet that contained a blow-up-doll, you know, a really ugly and cheap one which didn’t even have a wig. He told me to blow it up. It is about 1,50 m and has scratchy seams. It’s just really cheap.

He then told me that her name is Ugly and that he bought her as a friend for myself. “So you are Ugly and Useless now. Wow, you’re great together”. He said that in the next ten days my job would be to take care for Ugly, smooching wnd kissing with her and if I was really nice towards her, I might get to fuck her.

So I am nice towards her. I take her under the shower with me and wash her. I let her sleep in my bed, even if Ugly’s scratchy seams hurt me. I stroke her titties and lick her cunt and ass. John loves to watch me pleasing Ugly and it arouses me beyond words to use my energy to please that doll while my husband won’t let me give him BJs and doesn’t even kiss me. He watches me with disgust, just like you would watch a dog humping a pillow. And that’s so hot.

John promised to let me fuck Ugly next weekend, if I maintain my good behaviour. It’s a fact that I’m not sure whether I want to fuck Ugly, but I like the thought of being denied and having to fuck a doll in order to get a little pleasure. Just like a dumb dog. Woof!

Raw And Bloody

Well, I accept that sometimes Master has to release pressure and therefore uses me. That’s my duty and I want to be helpful. It doesn’t matter if I’m aroused and ready or if I even want it as long as he wants it, it’s alright for me. I embrace the fact that I’m a fucktoy and a slut. Therefore I am trained and this is my purpose.

So yesterday when he came home from training, he came to me while I was ironing some clothes. He just bend me over the counter by grabbing me by the hair and forcing me down while removing my trousers with a forceful jerk. When it didn’t go as he wanted, he began hitting and yelling at me, until I had managed to get all clothes down. I was wood-hard until then. When he entered me, I was dry and it hurt, so he just used what was handy (liquid starch) to get me wet. I don’t mind using other lubes than actual lube, so doesn’t he. While he fucked me relentlessly, he grabbed my cocklette and deformed and twisted it while it was still hard. The pain was raw, but I could not escape. With his other hand he held me in place, grabbed and tore my hair and hit me.

You know, I really adore the fact that even if he’s ravenous and aroused, he can still control hisself and delay his orgasm. He just seemed to fuck me forever, biting and hitting me, brutalizing and holding me down like an animal, a stupid, brainless fucktoy. It’s not about lve and respect, it’s just about being a hole for him to release anger. In these moments, when I feel all his physical strength, I feel so aroused by being overpowered that I usually don’t manage to cum. It’s as if my irrelevant small dicklette doesn’t even see a sense in trying to cum, because my own pleasure is not required. It’s awesome and I love feeling impotent and useless.

When he was almost there, he dragged me to my knees and shot his load all over my face, then made my lick him clean. Then he just left. No thanks, no sorry, not even a single word. I knelt there with my heart pounding and with my ears numb by the sudden silence. I needed to pause for a moment, and when I got up, I realized the blood on me, on my clothes and the floor. I admit that at first I got frightened for a second, then I smiled and thought how nice it was to see that I can still bleed for him like I was a virgin. It didn’t even hurt. I pulled up my panty and the trousers again, removed the blood from the floor and finished my work there.

Later, when I was done, he sat in the livingroom. He had eaten something and looked relaxed. When he looked up, he saw the stains on my clothes, and he just said “don’t even think of sitting on my sofa”. So I just sat down at his feet, waiting to be used again. Today I feel beaten up and have some bruises. I love that. All his.


Sometimes Master likes to make me do disgusting things. Why? Just because he can and for his amusement, and to remind me of my status as a dumb fucktoy. At these occasions he steps over my boundaries. For example he tells me to get dirty and besmear myself with what’s left in our bin after it got emptied, because he knows I have difficulties with dirt and rather shower four times a day than skip it one day. He makes me eat without using my hands or makes me eat things I despise, just to make me throw up and feel disgusting.

Getting dirty and having to do disgusting things is a special turn on for me when I’m dressed up like a nice, pretty gurl with clean clothes, make up and so on. Looking lovely and being treated like sh*t is just amazing, though of course I love looking slutty and being treated that way, too ๐Ÿ™‚ At these special times I’m denied to use a safeword. I merely do anyway, because I think a safeword just means you don’t trust your Dom and a sub should be up to please his Master. But just knowing no safeword will help me, is a big turn on as well. It takes surrendering oneself to a whole new level.

Today we met right after he had finished work and went shopping. He needed some shirts and trousers, and I wanted to see if I could find something for my male and something for my female needs, and I did. Afterwards, John invited me to dinner. As a starter, we ordered salad, but in his there were some bites he obviously didn’t like to eat. Instead of leaving them, he discreetely threw them on the floor. I was shocked! That’s nothing he had ever done before, but when he saw my bewildered face, he just chuckled and told me to shut up and eat. I did. And while I finished my salad, he threw even more on the floor.

When the entree was served, he did just the same. You know, I don’t eat meat, but he added potatoes, veggies and even a sprinkle of his sauce to the salad that was already on the floor. Because John gets upset by misbehaving very quickly, I was just wondering why he did that, but I did as he told me and just ate my dinner. I guess he wouldn’t have been able to do this at any location, but that restaurant is quite dim and as they had really a lot to do, nobody paid attention. And they had tablecloths as well.

When we were finished, he ordered dessert and coffee and bits of that and some teaspoons of coffee landed on the floor as well, and the more he had dropped, the more courage he had to drop even more. At some point, he leaned back, smiled at me and told me to get under the table and finish my dinner. I guess I must have looked stupid, because he chuckled and told me I looked stupid as fuck. “Now do what you’re told. And don’t use hands. Lick it off the floor”. Well, it might sound easy to get down on the knees, but in fact it wasn’t. I was afraid somebody would notice and I felt disgust and anger. Just like he had wanted me to. It took me some time to get over what he demanded as well, and finally I managed to get down there. It was a mess, and I felt at the verge of tears. I honestly didn’t want to do it, but obviously he knew and kicked me softly in the side. Alright then.

To be honest, the salad wasn’t that bad. When I tried not to think about what people who sat there before might have stepped into, it was O.K. The cold potatoes were okayish, but I guess Master thought I was doing too well and stepped on some veggies and smeared them all over the floor. I really had to lick them off the floor, mixed up with cold coffee and all the strange crumbs and pieces down there, like small particles of dust or whatever. It was gross. When I thought I was finished, he kicked me again to tell me I should lick his sole clean as well. I did. When I had made it up to the seat again, I wanted nothing more but a good sip of my cola, but he denied it. “I think you should savour the taste”, he grinned.

Ater we had returned home, he told me to stand straight in our kitchen, with a soap bar in my dirty mouth. I endured perhaps 10 minutes, then I was so sick I felt like vomiting. He laughed and then fucked me hard and painful, cumming all over my face. “Like it up, cunt”, was all he said, and I did. Dessert, right?

I’m just a dumb fucktoy and do as my Master tells me. I’m pathetic and deserve to be fed trash. Thank you, Sir.

Shock Collar

From his short stay in the UK this week Master has brought something for me: a shock collar. I’ve wanted one for ages, but it seems the people in Germany love their doggies too much to actually shock them. No big deal to buy a collar with signals or vibrations here, but of course I wanted one John could really hurt me with. You know, I believe in dictatorial parenting style ๐Ÿ™‚

Every now and then I love to wear collars anyway. The provide me with a feeling of being safe and held, you know, so I own some. Some are made of leather, others are just dog collars and I also have a choke collar I adore, beause that really hurts if handled the right way. Sometimes John likes to keep me on a lead, so why not give that shock collar a try?

First of all, it’s surprinsingly light weight and I love the way it feels on my skin. To work properly, it has to be worn near to the skin. On the remote, you can adjust the tension from 000 to 100. 10 feels like a soft pinch, like if you’re bruising your elbow a bit, and 100 is like someone’s ripping your neck apart LOL I quite like that. Best of all, even when I get shocked, Master doesn’t feel it, which is superpractical when he shocks me while he sucks me. It’s just a bit stressful to try not to bite him if he shocks me while I have his cock inside my mouth.

Of course we had to try to shock my cocklette and that REALLY hurts a lot. But I love that anyway. And apart fom this afternoon when we met with my brother and his wife I’ve been wearing my collar all the time. It’s so cute to be shocked while preparing lunch and know John is thinking of me while he’s in the office next door ๐Ÿ™‚